The Zombieslayer

I love how people love to point out faults in American cars.  Yes, every single car ever made has problems and American cars have their share.  However, right now there’s an American car company that according to Consumer Reports, is at the top or near the top in pretty much every single category - Ford.

That’s right.  Ford makes good cars.  (I can’t say the same about the other two American car companies unfortunately).

On the flip side, I’ve heard horror stories of bad cars.  I’ve read Ralph Nader’s reports of a glove box opening and almost decapitating a little girl during a small crash.  I know all about the memo of the exploding Pintos.

That was then.  This is now.

Toyota and Lexus have a serious problem where the accelerator keeps accelerating no matter what you do.  Watch this video.  It may just save your life.  And if you’re about to buy a car, don’t buy a Toyota or Lexus.  They refuse to acknowledge that it’s a problem, even though a lot of people have died already.

Toyota/Lexus accelerators out of control.

I hear women complain all the time how easy it is to be a man and other blah blah blah crap.  Whatever.

Let me get one thing immediately out of the way before I really start this rant.  I couldn’t be a woman.  It’s for the simple fact that women don’t know who their true female friends are.  Screw that.  That paranoia would drive me crazy.

OK, now that that’s out of the way, here’s my rant.  The grass is always greener for the other gender.

There’s an old saying that goes something like don’t judge someone until you’ve walked a mile in another person’s shoes.  It’s an old saying, but it’s timeless and still applies today.  Us men have our own issues to deal with.

So, men make more money than women? Well, you know what? That sucks for me too.  I wish Mrs. Z made a million dollars a year so I could sit at home and work on my novel.  She doesn’t.  I wish she did, but she doesn’t.  I have no problem with women making more money than me.  None at all.

Now, I hear women complain to me that making a lot a money intimidates men (well, those women who do make a lot of money).  Good.  Screw them.  Guys who are intimidated by a woman who makes a lot of money are pussies and you shouldn’t be settling for them anyways.  If you do, it’s your fault you have to deal with their insecurities, so stop bitching about it to me.

Death

This is something that is never brought up.  Men live 8 years LESS than women.  That’s reality for us.  You’ll outlive us for 8 years.  So all the crap that you have to go through, are you willing to get rid of it for 8 years taken off your life? Before you answer that question, consider it carefully.

Sex

Here’s an old joke for you.  Little Johnny and little Suzy are arguing who is better than who.  So little Johnny whips out his ding ding and says “my Daddy says because I have one of these, I’m better than you.”  So little Suzy drops her pants and says “well, my Mommy says because I have one of these, I can get one of those any time I want.”

That’s right.  It is women, not men, who get the choice of when and where to have sex.  Guys have to work to get laid.  Women just have to have a pulse.

So, want to trade?

The grass is always greener for the other gender

All that said, I won’t be switching any time soon.  Women have other issues to deal with that I’m not about to get into right now.  But before you think the grass is greener on the other side, you should seriously consider living on the other side.  Norah Vincent did and she ended up having to check into a mental health clinic afterward.

Now what I’m waiting for is for a guy to dress up like a woman for a year and write a book about it.  The problem is, I can spot a man-to-woman transvestite from a mile away and too many other people can.  If someone could pull it off, I want to hear brutal honesty like Ms. Vincent.  She pretty much covered everything from dating, hanging out, bowling leagues, employment, and if I remember correctly, she almost got into a fist fight.

Folks - I’ve been really busy and neglecting my blog.  Yes, it’s still active.  I’ll get back to it when I have more time.

More importantly, remember to vote tomorrow.  I’m not going to tell you who to vote for, but I will tell you that I have a preference that we vote out the incumbents.  They’ve obviously done a lousy job with leading the country, protecting the Constitution, and managing this economy.

Whatever you do, don’t make an excuse not to vote.  The only legitimate excuse not to vote is if you’re dead or you’re with someone who’s dying.  Yes, those are more important than voting.  Everything else is either laziness or mismanaging your time.