The Zombieslayer

Yeah yeah yeah. I know. I’m not supposed to get emotionally attached to sports. Following sports really is stupid as people get passionate about things they can’t control.

Well, I say screw it. I’m entitled to my flaws.

Last Summer, we spent a week in Vegas and while there I couldn’t help putting some money on my beloved Green Bay Packers. Why the Packers? Because they’re my favorite team. Emotions aside, I also put money on the Vikings to win the Super Bowl as I had inside information that Brett Favre was going to join them. No, I will not disclose my source.

So the Playoffs come around and the Packers get eliminated right away. It’s too bad as they were 25-1 odds and had they won, I would have had enough to take Mrs. Z on a European vacation. There goes a 2010 European trip.

So I’m stuck rooting for the Vikings with 8-1 odds. Not enough for the European trip but it would have paid for an Alaskan cruise. Kind of weird for a die-hard Packers fan rooting for the Vikings, but they got my favorite player now in Brett Favre.

I’m watching the game and Favre and the Vikings immediately drive down and get a 7-0 lead. I’m thinking they got this one. Before long it’s 14-7. Then the problems begin. Vikings fumble. Favre throws an interception. Vikings fumble. And fumble again. And again. And again. The offensive line looks like swiss cheese as Favre takes one hit after another with two hits hard enough that they almost knocked him out of the game. Ouch!

With all these miscues, they manage to keep the game at 28-28 and get in the position for a long field goal. So what do they do? Choke. They’re the Vikings. That’s what they’re good at.

While in field goal range, they get a five yard penalty which puts them out of field goal range. So that means Favre has to throw. He rolls right and does the one thing you’re absolutely not supposed to do - throw it across the field. Heck, I knew that from playing in high school. You don’t see things when you do that so you simply don’t do that. Ironically, he had enough room to run for about 10 yards so that would have put the Vikings back in field goal position.

Needless to say, the pass gets picked off. The game goes into overtime.

Five fumbles, two interceptions, and the game is tied at 28-28. Visiting team gets the coin toss. Some stupid Viking picks heads. Idiot! What’s the one thing you learn as a child about coin tosses? Tails never _____. (If you can’t finish that sentence, you probably never were a child).

He picks heads. Of course it comes up tails.

The Saints march down the field and some rookie kicker kicks the most beautiful forty yard field goal I’ve ever seen.

Choke. So much for the Alaskan cruise.

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Yeah yeah yeah.  There was a lesson there.  That still doesn’t mean I won’t do the same thing.  We’re probably going to hit Vegas again and while there, I’ll put money on the Packers and one other team to win the Super Bowl.  Not sure what that team is yet.

As for Favre, he’s got to come back.  He can’t end his career on this note.  That would be like if Judas Priest broke up after releasing Turbo.

You ever overhear someone so stupid that you want to slap them upside the head? Well, I wanted to yesterday.

I was with my family at the local American food restaurant.  We went there for shakes and sundaes, and we also split a fish and chips.

So next to us were a bunch of pretentious college kids talking really loud about astrology.  One said over and over again that they couldn’t date a Virgo, as Virgos and him just don’t click and usually fight.  However, several other signs were compatible.

No, I wasn’t being nosy.  Believe me, they were loud.   Everyone a few tables from them could hear every word they were saying and I saw more than one eye roll from nearby tables.

Now, let’s be logical about this.  Let’s say that at the hospital you were born at, 5 other babies were born at the same hour.  That will make them astrologically the same.  Same place.  Same time.  Same bat channel.

Of the five kids, one comes from the Upper Class.  One from the Lower Class.  One from a Working Class family.  One is Middle Class.  And one nobody knows as it was abandoned in the garbage can right outside the hospital.

Of those five other kids, let’s just say one will be physically abused.  One emotionally abused.  One sexually abused.  One will have an “average” life (like there’s such thing).  One will have the best life you can possibly imagine, with loving parents, healthy food, and a community that loves kids.

Let’s also say that one of the kids is grossly malnourished.  Let’s also say that another set of parents feeds their kid complete garbage and he or she is obese by the age of 6.  One set of parents goes on to win the lottery.  One invents something that makes them rich.  One parent disappears and is never heard from again and another parent dies in a car accident.

Don’t you think all this would have a hell of a lot more to do with upbringing than the position of some stupid planets and constellations? My God, are people really this stupid?

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For the record, I believe in Free Will.  I think of all the things that piss me off about astrology people, that is the biggest.  I’ve seen people who have had lives I couldn’t even fathom surviving through who turned out to be kind and decent people.  No matter what cards they’re thrown, they somehow make it.

Then I’ve known people who are nothing but excuses.

Free Will, folks.  Use it or lose it.

If you don’t know who Lemmy Kilmister is, he’s the lead singer and bass player for a band called Motorhead.  I happen to like their music as they were a precursor to Speed Metal, a genre of music that I greatly enjoyed in the 80s.

He’s also a very intelligent man.  At 64 years of age, they’re still touring the world and still making music.  Their latest album was dang good and Lemmy seems to have the same views of war that I do.  I do not believe in glorifying war.  War is horrible.  It is hell.  There is nothing sexy about seeing your best friend’s brains spilling out on a battlefield.  Literally spilling out.

Now you know I support the troops and whenever they go off to war, I wish them a quick victory and a quick trip home.  When you got friends and family in the military serving your country, it kind of makes war a little bit more personal.

Dang.  I went off on a tangent again.  I’m not supposed to be talking war.  I’m supposed to be talking about heroin.

OK, back to topic.  I hate heroin.  I’ve never tried it.  I’ve seen it in real life plenty of times.  I’d never try that stuff.  Ever.  No desire to.

However, I think Lemmy hit the nail on the head:

“I have never had heroin but since I moved to London from north Wales in ‘67 I have mixed with junkies on a casual and almost daily basis,” he said.

“I also lived with a young woman who tried heroin just to see what it was like. It killed her three years later. I hate the idea even as I say it, but I do believe the only way to treat heroin is to legalise it.” He stated that legalisation would eradicate the drug dealer from society.

Exactly my belief.  I hate the stuff.  It destroys families, not just users.  For the record, if a heroin junkie breaks into my house, I’m shooting him dead and will have no remorse about it.  It’s for defense of my family, as a heroin junkie will do anything to get his fix, including killing your entire family to get your valuables.

But there’s simply too much demand for it.  The way to treat it is to legalize it.  I know that sounds absurd to some folks but it’s true.  Countries that have set up systems to do this have taken out the drug dealer from the equation.  And as bad as a junkie is, drug dealers are their puppet masters.  They need to be taken out.  Legalizing it takes them out.  It’s as simple as that.

Agree? Disagree? Either way, I’d love to hear what you say.

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Source for Lemmy quote - Lemmy talks about drugs.

You shouldn’t be paying more than 10% income tax.  Period.

If the government can’t manage its budget with its citizens paying more than 10% of their hard-earned money to taxes, then that should be their problem.  Not yours.

Government needs to learn to balance its budget.  No more bailouts.  No more lending money to countries that can’t manage their money.  No more wars we don’t belong in.

No military-industrial complex.  No corporate welfare.  Limit welfare to two years except for Veterans and true handicapped people.  Establish English as a national language.  Sorry everyone else.  Learn it.  As far as I’m concerned, the only people who shouldn’t be forced to learn it are Native Americans.

All that should save money.  Also, like it or not, we’re going to have to raise tariffs on China.  This one way trade is killing this country’s economy.

So, I’d be fine with a progressive tax.  I have no beef with that.  If you’re poor, you pay under 10%, maybe as low as 2%.  Or 1%.  Whatever.  10% is for higher incomes.  Middle class should be somewhere in the middle.

This 30-40% tax is bullshit and it’s strangling the Middle Class.

First off, before I even begin this rant, I just want to say my heart goes out to every single person in Haiti.  Everyone there is affected, whether they lost someone or not.  I’ve seen a lot of footage of the quake and it’s a lot worst than anything I’ve seen in decades.  It’s ugly.

I think as people, the best we can do is help Red Cross.  They’ve been sending out teams to help.  If anyone has any other ideas, let me know.

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Now back to my rant, where’s my bailout? $787 billion spent with OUR tax money and Americans are wondering this.  All over the country.  President Obama’s popularity is officially under 50% as our economy continues to produce a 10% unemployment rate, with the “real” figure around 17%.

So the rich get bailed out and the Middle Class gets stuck with the bill.  The bankers are getting billions in bonuses.  Obama’s talking about doing something but he’s shown over and over that he’s all talk and no action.  Kind of like Bush saying he’d catch Osama bin Laden.  Has Bush caught him?

Obama did bring us the change he promised but he didn’t tell us the catch - it would be for the worst.   Wall Street are getting some of the biggest bonuses ever with OUR tax money while 17% of the population is unemployed.  Meanwhile, we’re still in two wars (while Obama got himself a Nobel Peace Prize).

I think the best line I’ve heard is from Harvard University’s Niall Ferguson - “If you’re trying to borrow $9 trillion to bail out your financial system and your economy, and already half your public debt is owned by foreigners, it’s not really the conduct of a rising empire is it?”

Scary times ahead folks.  This recession ain’t over.  If you’re wondering where your bailout is, you’re not alone.