The Zombieslayer

“You’re so lucky you’re slim.”  You know how many times I’ve heard that? If I had a barrel of oil for every time I heard that, I’ll hold that oil until the Summer peak price and then take a year off taking Mrs. Z and Junior around the world on various cruise ships.

I thought I heard every excuse for obesity on the books, but this one may just be the most absurd.  I used to work a Fitness Counselor, and you can imagine the excuses I heard.  It was NEVER anyone’s fault they were overweight.  It was always something else - bad genetics, too busy a schedule, no time to work out, blaming parents for bad dietary habits, can’t afford to buy healthier food, etc.  I’ve had numerous people lie to my face about their eating habits and exaggerate how much exercise they did in their time between workout sessions.

The thing is, they weren’t cheating me.  They were cheating themselves.  But I guess they were too stupid to see that.

This is the thing - I could care less how much anyone weighs.  If they’re cool to me, I like them.  Period.  I just don’t get why someone will pay me money for my advice, then discard my advice and counter with excuses.  Makes no sense whatsoever.

I got tired of that job really fast.  It paid better than my previous job, but I didn’t care.  I hated it.  So I moved on.

Simple physics

Unless you are GOD (or GODDESS for our Pagan friends), you cannot make matter from nothing.  It is not possible.  There is a very simple mathematical formula for either gaining or losing weight.  If you want to gain weight, you eat more calories than you burn off.  If you do that, you will gain weight.  If you want to lose weight, you burn off more calories than you consume.

There is nothing magical about that formula.  It is simple physics.  Yes, people have different metabolic rates.  But even that can be adjusted.  There are ways to speed up or slow down your metabolism.

Are you ready for this?

So, you’re probably wondering when I’m going to get to this absurd excuse.  Here it is.  Boston University conducted a study that shows that there is a tie between racism and obesity.  Yes, there are white people out there who put guns to the heads of black women and force them to eat and physically prevent them from exercising.  The study is here if you want to read it.  I personally got a kick out of the comments.  Apparently, the people commenting are more intelligent than the people wasting BU’s money with this silly study.

Dementia is like cancer. It’s one of those things that will never be cured. It doesn’t help either all the crap we’re putting into our environment.

It is not completely preventable either. We’re living too long. I had a Biologist friend of mine tell me that all men will eventually get prostate cancer if we live long enough. It’s just one of those things.

You can play the odds though. Here are a few tips at preventing dementia:

- Read a lot. Using your mind is your best weapon against dementia.

- Fish oil. Recent studies have shown that fish oil is not only good for heart but people who eat fish/fish oil have lower percentages of dementia.

- Use your fingers. I strongly suggest a musical instrument that uses your fingers a lot. One that you can do warm up exercises and scales too. Guitar, piano, violin, etc., all good instruments to learn to help prevent dementia.

- If you don’t play a musical instrument, do something else to use your fingers like knit, crochet, etc.  You need to use your fingers.

- Have sex a lot. No studies have shown anything that I’m aware of, but I just wanted to say that.

- Don’t eat aluminum. We don’t know if aluminum is a cause of dementia or aluminum retention in the brain is a result. Either way, I don’t want to find out the hard way. Studies have shown that people with both Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s have higher amounts of aluminum in their brains.

- Be physically active. Studies have shown that folks who are more physically active have less chances of getting dementia.

- Turn off the idiot box and live. They don’t call it an idiot box for no reason. I haven’t found the studies to prove it, but I’d be willing to bet that folks who watch more TV are more prone to get dementia than those who don’t.

So why am I writing this? You’re probably thinking that The Zombieslayer is just a Software guy and what does he know about dementia? I’ll tell you why, it’s been one of my biggest fears my whole life. My brain is everything to me. It’s my biggest strength, and I’d hate more than anything to lose it.

So yes, I’ve done my research. Best of luck to everyone. Unfortunately, luck is also involved and you can do everything right but still get dementia. But at least you can increase your chances of not getting it by following these tips.