The Zombieslayer

I was at a coffee shop yesterday with two other bloggers and I came across a Newspeak article written by some Indian (dot, not feather) guy about how America is on a decline and will be passed up. He goes off on America, saying that it’s no longer a good place to live, how Americans are unhappy, and a bunch of other crap. We just sighed and dismissed his nonsense.

For his American unhappiness, he uses a figure that 81% of Americans don’t like the way America is headed. Huh? Can you be a little bit specific? I don’t like the way this country is headed, but there’s not one other country in the world I’d rather be (and yes, I’ve been to plenty). OK, I’ll admit, I’d rather be vacationing back in the Caribbean right now, but to live, that’s what I meant.

For one thing, this guy is seriously biting the hand that feeds. India would be just another run of the mill third world country had it not been for America. You know this. The whole world knows this. But his head is too far up his ass to admit it, apparently.

Then he brags about Bollywood being bigger than Hollywood. So what! Let me get something straight. NOBODY in the world other than Indians watch the crap that comes out of Bollywood. The only reason it’s bigger is because there are 1.1 billion Indians in India alone. Their middle class alone is bigger than the entire United States’ population. Of course Bollywood is bigger. That still doesn’t change the fact that their movies suck.

United States, England, Japan, France, Spain, Italy, and Mexico all produce good film. I’m not too crazy about Hong Kong film, as I think it’s overblown, but it’s also considerably better than Bollywood film. Not saying much.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not anti-Indian. I’m just anti-this guy. Being in Software, of course I have close friends who are Indian.

I get defensive of my country. That’s how I am. Sure, we make mistakes. Our current President is corrupt and not very intelligent. The President before that may have been a sociopath. The one before that is the guy who taught the current President how to be corrupt. Yet, America chugs on. A President, no matter how bad, can only do so much damage.

So, I’m betting on America. I’m putting my money where my mouth is. When the Dow dipped below 12k, I went all out straight up Dow. Say what you will about America, but we’ll see who’s laughing in 10 years.

America leads the world in inventions. Still. Japan is #2. NO ONE else is even close. The #3 spot is a joke, and so unworthy I won’t even mention them.

America leads the world in Nanotechnology and also Biotech, two markets which will be huge in the near future. The amazing thing about those numbers is in both categories, America leads every other country in the world combined. Yes, that is not a misprint.

Doubters talk all day about the rise of China and India. I’m not worried. China is Communist, and we all know how Communism punishes the strong and rewards mediocrity. The Chinese have had a long history of being innovative people. This generation’s innovative Chinese have been run over by tanks, or are keeping their mouths shut because they don’t want to rock the boat.

India on the other hand never had a history of innovation. It’s not in their culture. They make excellent workers, but innovation? No. Their schools teach how to be employees, but not how to create. Copy? Sure. Create? No.

Europe has had better days. They’ll rise again, sure. But too many Europeans are obsessed with both political correctness and Socialism, two things that will cripple them and hold them back from achieving their utmost potential.

Don’t believe me? Fine. Think of the ten coolest things invented in the past 50 years. Bet at least nine on your list would be invented by America or Japan.

As for Japan, they’re our best friends. I’m not worried about competing with them, because of all our allies, besides Canada and the Thais, they’re probably my favorite.

Now Latin America on the other hand, I really see a strong future and America is making a HUGE mistake by trading too much with China and not enough with Latin America. If I were running this country, I wouldn’t miss this opportunity.

So if you think America is doomed, fine. Sell all your American stock. Get rid of all your American dollars. Invest elsewhere. Just don’t cry to me if you see everyone else get rich investing in America.

I’m no fan of rap. I don’t even call rap “rap music” because that’s almost an oxymoron. I like melody, and the majority of rap is devoid of that.

Now, other folks might dislike rap for the violence, the misogyny, or whatever. That has nothing to do with why I don’t like rap.

It’s because every single song is all about me. This song is about - me. This next song - me. The song after that - me and my money. The next song - how much money I have. The song after that - me and my ego. The song after that - me and my Mercedes Benz.

I am a proud American capitalist, and absolutely love American capitalism. I strongly believe it’s the most fair system out there. No, it isn’t perfect, but it’s the best we’ve got so far.

However, rap is the dark side of American capitalism. It glorifies the people who only care about money and nothing else. Hearing some of the words make me cringe, and make me embarrassed to be an American. Seriously, for you non-Americans - we’re not all a bunch of egocentric egomaniacs. Honestly, we’re not.

My wife said it best - it’s music that’s written by a perpetual two-year-old. You know how two-year-olds are. Those are rappers. It’s all about me. This is mine! Me! Mine! That’s mine!

I was listening to a comedian the other day and he was explaining the difference between comedians and rappers. Comedians have Dads. Rappers don’t. That explains everything.

I won’t watch the Miss America pageant with women. Refuse to. Done it before. I’d see 50 beautiful girls and the women I’d watch it with would take turns cutting them to shreds. They’ll find every last flaw, flaws that guys don’t even notice, flaws guys overlook.

“All men are assholes.”

“I hate men!”

“Guys are all a bunch of pigs. Every one of them.”

I hear this all the time. It’s commonplace. Men are to blame for everything wrong with the world. Men are also to blame for every single one of a woman’s insecurities.

I’ve given former lovers hundreds of compliments in hundreds of different ways. They fall on deaf ears. Women only remember the one negative thing some guy they never even met said and it will haunt them forever and no amount of shared awe for them will counteract it. It’s futile. Forget it.

But what really gets me is male misogyny in this country can’t even hold a candle to what women say to each other. They’re ruthless. They’re brutal. Of course, it’s still men’s faults.

“Skinny girls are for wimps”

Not joking, but I saw this on some lady’s blog. She had a button that flashed this.

I lost a co-worker a few months ago. It took her over two years of painful agony. I saw her a month before she died. It was sad to see her like that. 85 pounds. A month later, she was dead.

Cancer.

Is her widow a wimp?

A friend’s daughter never drank, smoke, did illegal drugs. Nice girl, good student. Got cancer too. Went through Chemo twice now. Thankfully, she’ll make it. She’s thin now. Anyone who dates her is a wimp?

Now know two people who have Crohn’s Disease. As with cancer, wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. Their spouses wimps?

A dear friend of mine grew up in this thing called poverty. Mother was a co-dependent loser and mother’s boyfriend spent their welfare on drugs. Kids never ate. She’s gaining weight now, but used to be rail thin. Is her boyfriend a wimp? Probably shouldn’t call him that considering he’s a former amateur MMA fighter.

Somalian women come tall and thin. That’s just how they come. I’d love to see this blogger go to Somalia and call Somalian men wimps for marrying Somalian women. See how that goes over.

Women on women hate

Women on women hate is pathetic. I don’t get it. Look at women’s magazines. Look at Hustler. Hustler has real women. Women’s magazines on the other hand, come on. And somehow, men are to blame for that?

You’ve seen this scene before. Angela comes around to her group of friends and they all smile and say hi. The minute she leaves, they rip into her, exposing every weakness and flaw. But somehow of course, there’s a guy pulling their strings, right? Women on women hate won’t exist without men, right?

If all the men would disappear from the world, I guarantee you, there will still be anorexia, bulimia, and every other disorder blamed on men. I’m not blaming the victim here. I’m just calling a spade a spade.

The average guy is a nice guy, warm, friendly, and actually likes women. He’ll be taken for granted though. They only remember the asshole.

I’ve had my chart read before. It was surprisingly accurate, and even successfully predicted the hair color of my next girlfriend.

So I did a little research. I’m a Gemini, and found the description of what a Gemini is fit me 100%. I couldn’t believe it. That was me to a tee!

Then I started reading the other ones. I read Virgo and it was just like me. To a tee. Then I read Aquarius and it was just like me. To a tee. I ended up reading all twelve and they were all like me.

Breaking news. Humans are complex. You are energetic. You are lazy. In some situations, you’ll make a wonderful leader. In other situations, you’d be better off being a follower. You are smart. Sometimes, you are stupid. Sometimes you’re brave and could do things that surprise even you. Sometimes, you hide from reality. You are both open-minded and stubborn. Sometimes you are independent. Sometimes, you need other people to help you get through.

You have been both wise and stupid with monetary situations. Join the club. So have the rest of us. You were more idealistic and liberal when you were younger, and became more realistic and conservative when you got older. Or maybe you didn’t, but that’s the route a lot of us took. You are sometimes lively. Sometimes, you just want to rest. You can be pleasant on some days and some days, people need to give you space.

I could go on and on and on, but you see my point.

The origin of astrology

You are in control of your destiny. Not the planets. Not the stars. Astrology came from a time before science, when folks thought we were the center of the universe and the stars and planets were just bodies out there that affected our lives. Now that we know more about science, hate to say it, but we’re just a small planet surrounding a relatively small star in just another galaxy. There is nothing special about us. Nothing.

You make your choices because you are you. You don’t not make your choices because you’re a Virgo or Gemini or whatever.

You may be wondering why sometimes they’re right. Well, of course they’re right sometimes. It’s because they make 365 predictions a year. They’re bound to get several of those right.

I could write down 365 predictions of your life right now, and I bet you I get at least 10 right on. I mean spot on, to a tee. Does that make me have supernatural powers? If so, call me Zombiesladamus. I like how that sounds.

So I’m reading Chuck Klostermann’s Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs and I came to the realization that it’s not just The Sims, it’s all video games. Video games are not only a waste of time, but the end result is nothing accomplished and an empty feeling afterwards.

I’ve defended porn on many occasions. I keep hearing people say porn is degrading to women. That’s utter bull. There are so many variations of porn that to single out one group being degraded is to close your eyes to all the rest.

If you’re anywhere near my age, you’ll remember the Eurythemics song Sweet Dreams are Made of This. If you’re younger, you may have heard the Marilyn Manson cover of that song. It’s about porn. “Some of them want to use you. Some of them want to be used by you. Some of them want to abuse you. Some of them want to be abused.”

Someone gets used and abused. It’s not always the woman, so that whole argument is bogus. Unlike video games though, porn always has a happy ending. If you got one not to your liking, you must have accidentally grabbed someone else’s fantasy instead of the one you wanted.

So, here I am in my late 30s and I can’t do the guitar solos I used to do when I was 19. Why? Because I’m always preoccupied doing something else. I work 40 hours a week, have a wife and kid, try to spend quality time with both of them, work out regularly, keep a blog, read, keep up with the news, politics, and what’s going on with the Green Bay Packers, listen to music, play video games, practice guitar, and once a week try a new thing to cook. Something has to give.

I don’t even own a t.v. anymore so I can’t blame the idiot box for my wasted hours. So video games will have to go.

I just won a game today. It felt great when the tide turned and I started winning my battles. Then as it came near the end and it was clear I was going to win the war, it became anti-climatic and not even fun any more.

Sure, porn gets boring the second time you watched it, but at least it didn’t limit your world like video games do. Yes, when you play a video game, the rules are limited to the rules the writers give you. You cannot think outside the box. You have to follow their rules and play in their world. Talk about limiting creativity.

So no more. The rest of ‘08, I won’t play another video game. Then maybe I could spend more time on the guitar and conquer those guitar solos I wrote when I was 19.